Matt, 5 - Idaho Award Winner

Age

My son had a friend over when I was pregnant.  I had to tell the friend that MY WATER BROKE and I had to GO TO THE HOSPITAL.  I later found out he went home and TOLD HIS PARENTS HE HAD TO LEAVE BECAUSE WE WERE HAVING PLUBMING PROBLEMS.

HontheP

Anonymous, 6 - Arizona Award Winner

Animals

While busy WORKING IN MY DOG GROOMING SALON to my surpise MY DAUGHTER ANSWERED THE PHONE.  The person on the other end ASKED TO SPEAK TO THE GROOMER.  My daughter blurted out "SHE'S IN THE TUB WITH A CUSTOMER RIGHT NOW"
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Anonymous, 3 - Montana Award Winner

Shirt & Gift Taglines

Is daddy taking his GRIEFCASE TO WORK today?  (Briefcase)
HontheP

Christine, 9 - Minnesota

Love

ROMANTIC ADULTS are usually all DRESSED UP...so if they'r just WEARING JEANS it means they USED TO GO OUT or THEY JUST BROKE UP
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David, 6 - Ohio Award Winner

Religion

After looking at my BABY PICTURES IN BLACK & WHITE and my CHILDHOOD PICTURES IN COLOR my son asked "Mom WHEN DID GOD INVENT COLOR?"
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Mike, 10 - Texas Award Winner

Shirt & Gift Taglines

On the FIRST DATE people just TELL EACH OTHER LIES...that usually GETS THEM INTERESTED ENOUGH to go for a SECOND DATE

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David, 6 - Texas Award Winner

Animals

While walking with 3 boys in tow we saw A MAN WALKING HIS DOG and 10 paces in front of him were a GROUP OF GIRLS. As the girls changed directions, the MAN DECIDED TO HAVE A GOOD STARE at the girls except he didn't see the CURB coming.  His little DOG'S LEASH got caught around his feet and HE WENT DOWN. This in itself was funny but then my oldest son shouted "Hey Mister I'm gonna CALL THE POLICE if you keep TRYING TO KILL YOUR DOG".
HontheP

Libby, 9 - Michigan

Health

My daughtet came home from CAMP, and the topic of FIRE ANTS came up.  When I asked her what she would do if FIRE ANTS WERE NEAR, she replied "STOP, ROCK & ROLL"
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Anonymous - Colorado Award Winner

Body

While SHAMPOOING AND RINSING my son's hair I said HE'D NEED A HAIRCUT SOON because his HAIR WAS GROWING SO FAST.  He replied "MAYBE WE SHOULDN'T WATER IT SO MUCH"
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Anonymous, 6 - Kansas

Body

At 8 1/2 months PREGNANT while SWIMMING WITH MY DAUGHTER she pointed at my stomach and asked "Aren't you GOING TO DROWN HIM?"
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Kelsie, 2 - Iowa

Lessons

Dad: What does a KITTY DO?

Daughter: Meow

Dad: What does a DOG DO?

Daughter: Bark

Dad: What does a MOMMY DO?

Daughter: DADDY

http://loveofbabyonline.com

Roger, 6 - Georgia Award Winner

Shirt & Gift Taglines

If it's your MOTHER you can KISS HER ANYTIME...but if it's a NEW PERSON you have to ASK PERMISSION
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Anonymous, 5 - Ohio

Life

Watching TV my son heard the announcer talking about a CELEBRITY ENTOURAGE, and he asked what that was.  I told him it was a group of people that WENT EVERYWHERE WITH YOU, OPENED DOORS, GOT THINGS YOU NEEDED and sometimes HELD ONTO YOUR MONEY FOR YOU until you wanted it.  He replied "Oh you mean LIKE A HUSBAND?"

HontheP

Craig, 9 - Virginia

Love

If I was on a 1st DATE that WENT SOUR...I'd run home and PLAY DEAD.  The next day I'd call all the NEWSPAPERS and make sure they WROTE ABOUT ME IN ALL THE DEAD COLUMNS.
HontheP

URL: http://thegreengrandma.blogspot.com

I can't believe I ate the whole thing.

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Another example of why kids should always wear helmets - Plunger Attacks

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Daddy I thought you said my bike goes through puddles?

Fools rush in where angels fear to tread